Alcohol Killed My Father, and I Watched It Happen
"You look like a school bus." That’s how it began. One month before a hospital visit that would change everything, a son confronted his father about the obvious signs of liver failure. The yellowed skin. The fatigue. The denial.
He already knew the answer. His dad had relapsed. Again.
In this deeply personal episode of Sober Strong, we hear a powerful story of love, loss, trauma—and the long shadow alcohol can cast over an entire family. What makes this conversation even more meaningful? The storyteller works in the wine industry and is now 43 days sober.
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Recognizing Relapse: The Warning Signs We Don’t Talk About
After 14 years of sobriety, his father began drinking again. The trigger? The loss of his own mother.
The relapse wasn’t immediate. It started with “just one” White Claw. Then another. And soon, a hidden stockpile of cans in the garage, receipts from wine clubs, and “forgotten” trips to the pantry became part of the daily routine.
Alcohol didn’t come back into his life with a bang. It crept in through excuses.
At first, it seemed different. He wasn’t raging. He wasn’t violent. But the volume told a darker story: two cases of seltzers per day. What many think of as “light” or “harmless” alcohol had become a quiet killer.
Functional on the Outside, Deteriorating on the Inside
This wasn’t his father’s first round with alcohol.
In childhood, our guest witnessed the damage firsthand. A fifth of bourbon a day. Angry outbursts. Car rides with hidden bottles. The unpredictable presence of a man whose love was buried under addiction.
Eventually, the family made a plea. For his 10th birthday, he asked his dad to quit drinking. Miraculously, he did. Cold turkey. The shakes, the sickness, and then Alcoholics Anonymous. He rebuilt his life, even participated in mission trips, and built homes in Mexico. For over a decade, he was sober—and present.
But sobriety without healing is fragile.
When the Type of Alcohol Changes—but the Damage Doesn't
During his relapse, his drink of choice changed. No more bourbon. This time, it was flavored seltzers and hidden bottles of wine.
“People think seltzers are healthier,” he says, “but if you drink twice as much, it doesn’t matter what it is.”
Volume overproofed content.
Even without the aggression of hard liquor, the alcohol still wore his father down—physically, emotionally, mentally. It made him hide. It made him lie. And eventually, it made him sick.
Very sick.
Behind Closed Doors: Alcohol, Secrecy, and Family Tension
For many families, alcoholism hides in plain sight. Trips to the car that don’t make sense. Excuses not to attend sober events. Receipts that don’t match the story.
This family saw all of that. But by the time they realized how bad it was, it was already too late.
His father began to fall. His skin turned yellow. His memory blurred. Then came the hospital visit. The scans. The words no one wants to hear: brain bleed, liver failure, ammonia poisoning.
In one of his last coherent moments, the son looked at him and said: “You look like hell. You have to go to the hospital.”
The Devastating Cost: What Alcohol Really Took
His father didn’t survive. After weeks in and out of the ICU, specialists confirmed what the family feared—his liver was beyond repair. The damage from years of drinking had made him ineligible for a transplant. The only option left was hospice.
The grief wasn’t just about death. It was about lost time. Missed moments. Conversations that never happened. Grandchildren he’ll never meet. A wedding he won’t attend.
“My dad wasn’t just an alcoholic. He was my best friend.”
The son and his family sat by his father’s side every hour until the end. And when the heart finally stopped, it wasn’t just one life that ended. A piece of the family went with him.
Making the Hardest Choice: Quitting in a World That Encourages Drinking
While working in the wine industry, surrounded by endless supplies of alcohol, the son made his decision.
He quit drinking.
“I realized I drank a lot more than I thought I did. It consumed my time, my energy, and more than I was willing to admit.”
At first, it was “only on special occasions.” Then Thanksgiving happened. Then a cruise. Then… no more. He stepped away. For real.
Today, he’s on day 43 of sobriety.
Shot of Life: A New Mission
He and his fiancée created Shot of Life, a growing platform to normalize sober living and create resources for people who’ve been affected by alcohol—not just those addicted, but the children, spouses, and siblings left in its wake.
Their goal? Promote an adventurous, fulfilled life—without needing alcohol to amplify it.
Advice for Families: What He Wants Others to Know
Relapse happens slowly. Pay attention to the signs.
Lighter alcohol isn’t safer—just sneakier.
Don’t assume calm equals control.
Conversations won’t always change someone. But silence never will.
Sobriety is not just about putting down the bottle. It’s about dealing with the reason you picked it up.
Final Words: What Alcohol Could Never Take
Despite everything, the son chooses to remember the best of his dad. The donuts before school. The horse ranch projects. The mission trips. The barbecues. The man he was when he was sober.
He now carries that version of his father with him—and honors him by breaking the cycle.
“If it wasn’t for liver failure, he’d still be here.”
And now, through Sober Strong and Shot of Life, his story might help someone else stay here, too.
Ready for Your Reset from Alcohol?
If this story resonated, don’t wait for another rock bottom. Get help, get honest, and get moving.
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